One Year Ago

365 days, 52 weeks, 12 months, 1 year. In the grand scheme of things one year is not a long time. It has been a crazy journey this last year and on this day one year ago the Lord really started something in me. I was headed to Cambodia!! Along with six other people (my team) that I have grown to love and care for! How crazy is that, I was on a plane headed to the other side of the world to spend almost three weeks with nationals I had never met!! I had a plan but God knew better! So much has happened in that year! The Lord has taught me so much and used this journey to continue to grow me into a women after his own heart!!! I would not change anything about my experience. I did not do everything perfectly but I know there was a reason for me being on that team!!

My Cambo Family at the Beach

Family Portrait

 

The Van!!





The guys were singing to us!!

 

Our awesome ride: Tuk Tuk Style

Oh wait... its a Limo Tuk Tuk!

Love these Ladies!

 

 

 

 



Teaching English class



Sums up our relationship "Rolling On The Floor Laughing"

 

"Cow Went up the Mountain"

 

 

Iced Coffee

We got to celebrate a birthday while we were there!!

Here is just a small look into what our time was like while we were there! Teaching English and loving on the students that the Father brought our way! It was such a blessing and I wish I was heading back there right now! Lord only knows when that will be and I will wait!

 

Christmas 2012

In the sixth month of Elizabeth’s pregnancy, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee, to a virgin pledged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of David. The virgin’s name was Mary. The angel went to her and said, “Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you.”

 Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be. But the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary; you have found favor with God. You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you are to call him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over Jacob’s descendants forever; his kingdom will never end.” 

“How will this be,” Mary asked the angel, “since I am a virgin?”

 The angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come on you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God. Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be unable to conceive is in her sixth month. For no word from God will ever fail.”

Luke 1:26-37

 

In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) And everyone went to their own town to register. So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them. And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

 Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”

 When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”

 So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told. On the eighth day, when it was time to circumcise the child, he was named Jesus, the name the angel had given him before he was conceived.

Luke 2:1-21

This is the account of the one who saved us from death and brought us to life. God humbled himself and became a man to resuce those He loves. Jesus has changed my life and He continues to shape me. Those of you who don't know Him, He is waiting for you!! It is the best decision you will ever make!



Books

Want to know the way to my heart??

Books... Reading... Libraries...

 

I am and will always be a secret nerd bomber!! I am not ashamed of my love for books and reading and just overall learning! I love to get caught up in a story and not knowing what twist and turns the author is bringing next! I get so invested in the books that I am reading that I have a hard time after I close the back cover! When I was younger, during our summer breaks, my parents would do anything in their power to get my siblings to read. We would get a little trinket or prize for every five books that we read during the summer. No shame in saying that I killed it every summer! My parents could not keep up with the amount of books I would go through. So they started putting a page limit on the deal. "Every book you read that is over 300 pages" etc.

 

I could not image what life would be like without books! My personal library continues to grow each year! My dream and secret goal in life is two-fold

1) I will have a library like the one in Beauty and the Beast.

2) I will visit the World's 20 Most Beautiful Libraries

And that is where I am going to camp for the rest of this post! I have a problem.

 

Over the summer I was randomly searching the Internet (for I don't know what) but I came across a website that list the 20 most beautiful libraries in the world and fell in LOVE! I mean I immediately started making plans.

I got on mapquest.com and started to figure out where each library is located and the best route to take to visit each one in the least amount of time! I broke it up into three trips 1) North America 2) Europe and 3) The Others (which this one might have to be more than one trip to get them all)

 

Here is just a little taste of their individual beauty!
 

Abbey Library St. Gallen, Switzerland

 

Biblioteca Geral University of Coimbra, Coimbra, Portugal 

 

Central Library, Seattle

 

George Peabody Library, Baltimore, Maryland, USA

 

Herzog August Library, Wolfenbüttel, Germany

 

Jay Walker's Private Library

 

Library of Congress, Washington, DC, US

 

Library of Parliament, Ottawa, Canada

 

Library of the Benedictine Monastery of Admont, Austria

 

Melk Monastery Library, Melk, Austria

 

National Library, Belarus

 

Old British Reading Room, British Museum, London, England

 

Real Gabinete Portugues De Leitura, Rio De Janeiro, Brazil 

 

Rijkmuseum Library, Amsterdam

 

Sansovino Library, Venice, Italy

 

Stiftsbibliothek Klosterneuburg, Klosterneuburg, Austria

 

Strahov Monastery - Theological Library, Prague, Czech Republic

 

Trinity College Library, AKA, The Long Room, Dublin, Ireland

 

Wiblingen Monastary Library, Ulm, Germany 

 

Riksdagen Library, Swedish Parliament Library, Stockholm, Sweden

 

So there they are! All 20 of them! Now I know that this is a huge endeavor to take on but I am determined! Obviously Jay Walker's Personal Library might be a bit of a stretch but I believe the rest of them are manageable before I die! I have mapped out the order of the Europe trip already:

1) Dublin, Ireland

2) London, England

3) Amsterdam, Netherlands

4) Wolfenbüttel, Germany

5) Prague, Czech Republic

6) Klosterneuburg, Austria

7) Melk, Austria

8) Admont, Austria

9) Ulm, Germany

10) St. Gallen, Switzerland

11) Venice, Italy

 

 That is totally doable right?? :-)

I just have to figure out when I am going to do this and who I am going to do it with!! Maybe I will be able to convince my future husband to slowly start visiting these places as we grow old together! *Too sappy?? I love it*

 

How crazy would it be to say I "ran" around the world "chasing" pretty libraries!

 



Semester DONE!

I am one semester closer to having an Environmental Engineering degree!!
I can not believe how fast this semester flew by! This has by far been the hardest semester of my college career in terms of school! I have never felt so accomplished in all the work that I did.
  
"The hand of the diligent will rule, while the slothful will be put to forced labor." Proverbs 12:24
   
"And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."
Colossians 3:17
   
"Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men..."
Colossians 3:23

These verses definitely did not ring true 24/7 this semester. There were days/nights that I did not want to do anything related to school but I know that without the Lord's help I would not have made it through. I was talking to my friend Vicky the other day about how proud I was of our class for the semester we just got through. I have never felt so good about all my classes in one single semester! Now lets get real, I did not make all A's and honestly I am OK with that. I am not a straight A student and I never have been and I never plan to be (since I only have one semester left). I will leave that to my siblings. They can make it happen. 

I wont know what my grades are for a while but I am content in what I get I know that the effort I put in is going to by reflected in them! I am so thankful for those who have helped keep me sane through these crazy four months! I can't imagine getting this semester done with out my amazing classmate and wonderful roommates, and my parents who always bring me back down to earth with each phone call.
 

December!! What?

Fall/Winter is my favorite time of year!
I love hearing the fallen leaves crunch under my feet as I am walking to class!
My favorite kinds of clothes to wear: scarves and hats.
I love being warm in the cold.
Getting a break from school.
Giving gifts to family and friends.
CUDDLING, who does not like cuddling (besides Yasmin)!!
Hot chocolate and a fire in the fireplace.
Being with family during Christmas break.
Decorating and putting lights on the tree.
Going to see the Christmas lights.

FINALLY IT FEELS LIKE CHRISTMAS!! I just finished my first final of the semester and only two more stand in the way of my break! It still just blows my mind how fast this semester has gone by. I ready to put my ornaments on the tree back at home, bake with my sissys, wrap gifts, listening to Christmas music and everything else that comes with this time of year.

I got to celebrate St. Nick Day with Caitlin (my sister) this year since she is up in Norman now. I have missed being with my family on this day!! It was so fun, to celebrate the "real santa"! Neither of us were able to get up super early so we didn't get around to opening our package until about noon. It was great to continue with the tradition; very simple and fun gifts!! I am so grateful that my parents started this so long ago, this is something that I will do with my kids one day!

I can not wait to be done Wednesday night and have some fun!
I can not wait to sleep in.
I can not wait to see my family, celebrate my daddy's day, and remember Jesus's birth (the real reason for Christmas)!
I can not wait for a new year!!

Discipleship

Discipleship is a concept I did not really get to see lived out until I got to college. Living life with someone and learning from them in the process was never something I really got to do with people that would have a positive impact on me. The friends I had growing up were the one who influenced me and they were not walking with the Lord. My senior year, the Lord really opened my eyes to the fact that I needed to make a change. The main reason I came to the University of Oklahoma was to grow in my relationship and understanding of Jesus and I had to realize that I was not going to be able to grow and work through things on my own.

 

I knew from the very beginning that I wanted to be discipled. I knew that if I came to OU for the reasons I said that this was a step that I needed to take. Also some of the girls that I was getting close to were also making the same decision and part of me used that as motivation (not necessarily the right ones but it worked). I have learned amazing lessons from each of the women that God has placed in my life. I can't imagine where I would be if these ladies had not walked into my life at the time God allowed.

 

One thing that I have also learned this semester with discipleship is that it is not just going to fall into your lap. As I entered what I call my "transition year" seven months ago, I knew I still wanted to do life with someone older and wiser than me but I was not sure who. Due to the fact that I was leaving the BSU and not deeply involved in a church yet, I was not sure if I had any options. I found a Church over the summer that I fell in love with and looked for opportunities there. What I found turned out to be nothing that I expected. I signed up for a gospel training program called ReTrain that would give me a chance to be "gospel coach" by someone every other week and I was excited!! This semester is a week from being over for me and I have yet to meet with this "coach" once. I am not sure what happened with but it did not happen.

 

This year has also taught me that discipleship can look very different and that life on life is what it truly is about. Nikki Frana... OH WOW... I mean Nikki Meinen has been a rock for me this year. Getting time with me once a week, hanging out, going to dinner and just loving me when I need it. I learn from her just like I would learn from someone 5 years older than me. We continue to live life together even though she is married and I am still in school. It is about growing in the Lord and having that community.

 

 

Andrea Unrau discipled me my freshman year of college and was my roommate during my sophomore year.

 

Miss Sarah Savage (soon to be Mrs. Mace) helped me walk through my sophomore and junior year. Loving on me but also challenging me

Yasmin Vila Limo was not only my discipler my senior year but also my team leader in Cambodia that Christmas.


I am so grateful for these beautiful, Godly women. I can not express how much I appreciate the influence they have on me. The Lord really has blessed me with wise counselors and most importantly great friends! I love each of them for the impact they have had on me! Thank you ladies :-)


My flesh fails daily

I am not always going to get it right.

I am not prefect.

I have messed up.

I am still learning.

I do sin.

I am a sinner.
I am going to fail again.

And sin again. And again. And again.

I am forgiven, even before I do it

I don't know.

But I think I do.

I am covered by His love.

I do not deserve grace.

I am saved by Him who first loved me.

I am cherished.

I am a light to other.

I am a idolater.

I am smart.

I am stupid.

I will be a life long learner.

I am continually changing.

 

 

Romans 5:8

but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

 

Galatians 2:20

I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

 

1 John 3:1 

See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him.

 



SILLY!!

Triangles... Very simple... But can make life so complicated.

This has been one of the most conflict filled months! I know in everything that happens the Lord is teaching me something new (or even something I need to learn again). I just have a hard time seeing it in the moment.

How does this play into the conflict?

The situations that the Lord has allowed into my life in the last month have all involved two other people besides myself... hence the triangle shape. Each corner respresent one of us and the connection we have to each other.

I don't like being in the middle of other people's stuff and this has just been an unfortunate theme that has carried over into a few areas of my life. I have gotten better at conflict resolution since I got to college which is just a blessing from the Lord, for the simple fact that I would have no friends if I had not learned haha. I hate unnessassary conflict, that could be avioded.

What is the Lord trying to teach me through these situations:
1) He is in control of non-believers lives just as much as mine.
2) I must trust and obey; trust and obey.
3) I can't let other control the decisions I make for myself.

I am not upset that these things have happened when I actually sit back and think about how the Lord is going to use them to grow not only myself but my friendships and those involved in those friendships. Even if I am not the one who needs to learn someone is going to benefit, I just have to remember that not everything revolves around myself ;-)
 

 



I will NEVER walk alone

"What are your plans for after graduation?"

"Do you know what you want to do?"

The most FAQ you get as a college senior, and I hate it.

My future is unknown and right now I am OK with that fact.
Since the last post I now have 164 days until I graduate!

I do get nervous when I dwell on the this fact: I am going to be working a 9-5 in less than 6 months. I don't want to think about the fact that I need to be proactive in getting a job.

One: I can and am just being lazy

Two: I don't want to add another TO DO to my already crazy list this semester

Three: I don't really know what I want to do

and Four: It really does make me nervous.

Today at Redeemer they played "Never Once" by Matt Redman during Worship. This song really reminds me that I might get really nervous not knowing but not once have I walked through life on my own. My Lord is going to pull me through this part of my journey too, just like He has in the past.
Here are some of the lyrics:

Standing on this mountaintop
Looking just how far we’ve come
Knowing that for every step
You were with us

Kneeling on this battle ground
Seeing just how much You’ve done
Knowing every victory
Was Your power in us

Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Yes, our hearts can say

Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

Scars and struggles on the way
But with joy our hearts can say
Never once did we ever walk alone
Carried by Your constant grace
Held within Your perfect peace
Never once, no, we never walk alone

Never once did we ever walk alone
Never once did You leave us on our own
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

Every step we are breathing in Your grace
Evermore we’ll be breathing out Your praise
You are faithful, God, You are faithful
You are faithful, God, You are faithful

 

I am glad that I have had this fifth year of school (for a few reasons) but ultimately, not in a good way, it has allowed me to put off the inevitable. I have not had to think about what after college will look like because it has not ended yet, but now it is ending!
I have one big fear when it comes to getting done with school and that is: The Lord is going to send me somewhere that I do not want to go, or that is not on my list. This song helps me take that fear to the Lord and trust that He is going to work all things out for me, who loves Him. Because He is faithful! 
Even though I am a very stubborn person and am having a hard time coming to term with the fact that I could stay here in Norman or even head back to Fort Worth, I might not like it at first but I will be fine with it. Knowing that the Lord is in it, it much more important for me in where I end up. I know where I want to end up (West of here: Colorado, California etc) but His ways are higher than my ways and I need to get to a point where I will be ok if "West" is not where God wants me.


The Lord is going to contiune to be faithful in my life and show me where it is that I am going to grow His kingdom best. I will continue to seek Him and His will over mine!!
What does the Lord have for me?? Right now, I do not know. I am holding on to the fact that wherever it is He is going to be right there with me. Pray for me as I contiune to walk in this journey and become proactive as well as make the decision that need to be made.

Anna and Addi

 

This is just a fun post for me because I got to see my God-daughter this yesterday while I was home for Thanksgiving.

I had a blast catching up with Kristen and Devin as well as getting to know Addi! At first she did not know what to think of me. I tell Kristen all the time that Addi isn't sure because of my big glasses.

I am so grateful for the Parks family and the blessing that Kristen has been to me over the years! I am so thankful that she has allowed me to have a role in Addison's life!

 



"One for Addi and two for Aunt Anna"

 

Addi and I both really like to eat and while I was at her GIGI's house, we both bonded over M&Ms and goldfish. She is just a little chub and I am so glad to be in her life! I can't wait for her to grow up and really know who I am. I think she is coming around to me since I was the one who gave her the candy haha

Addi is sharing her goldfish with me!

 

The last time I saw Addison was on her first birthday and in the last three months she has grown up into a little person. I look at her and just get so excited to continue to watch her grow up. I just can't believe that she is getting so big so fast!

 

I am done! LOVE YOU ADDI

Birthday Blues

Every year around this time I go through a fight with myself.... my birthday!

I have a lot of insecurities and doubt when it comes to knowing that people (my friends and family) really do love me. I take what people say and do as well as  don't say and do to me very personal, even if I seem like I don't. I have had so many friends over the years love me one minute and then talk nasty about me the next and this doubt has just followed me. Even now with the friends that I am in college, when my friendship are based on more than just liking the same movie, music, boy etc but are rooted deep in Christ. 

 Ever since I can remember I have always associated how much the Lord and other people love me with the way I get treated me on my birthday. It is not accurate at all but it is how my mind works. This year is no different. As my birthday approaches I find myself thinking about this and wondering where this association comes from. Over this last weekend, while I was at home, I got some great one on one time with my Mother! Through the conversation we had, I learned a lot about myself and came to the realization that a lot of how I view things now stems from the foundations I laid in middle school and high school and not walking with the Lord at the time as well as the influence that my girl friends had on me.

Lessons from Mother
1) I have put God in a box over the years: God is only good if the things in my box happen.
2) God wants to bless and love me in ways that I don't see (outside the box).
3) If everyone else failed me... God is still my hope.
4)My frame of reference is filtered through how I was treated and grew in high school.
5) Habakkuk 3:17-19
"Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign LORD is my strength; he makes my feet like the feet of a deer, he enables me to go on the heights."

 It really makes me grateful that I have grown so much in the Lord and the person that He has changed me into is nothing like who I was in high school!! I know that God has a plan for my life and as I contiune to learn from Him and grow, He is going to use the things from my past to benefit others.
The Lord is my hope and even when "everyone" else forgets me, He is still by my side, loving me!

Where has the time gone??

This year has just flown by!! I really can't believe this semester is almost over. I don't even want to talk about the fact that college went by faster then lighting. Just a few stats:

17 days until my 23rd Birthday
52 days until Christmas Break starts
83 days until I start my last semester of college
145 days until my last chance for Spring Break
199 days until I graduate for college

Yeah less then 200 days and I will be done with my undergraduate career. How crazy is that!! I cannot wait until I get my diploma and walk across that stage. BUT when I dwell on my future it scares the ever-living out of me and I just want to stay in school forever haha. I know there is a perfect place and job out there for me. I need to take the time to pray for it.

 I really have grown up over the last five years and it has been such a blessing to walk with God through it all and continually count on him for the means to get by. I think about where I was when I started my freshman year and wonder "What was I thinking?" I knew there was so much for me to grow in and learn from but now looking back four years later I had no idea what God was going to bring into my life.

I seem to have come full circle again and now that I am looking to my future and making decisions not only about a job but also where the location of that job will be. I have no idea!! I keep telling myself "Anna just pray about it." But I don't even know what exactly to be praying about at this point, I just don't have a whole lot of direction. I guess that I the best place to start if any.

Guide me in your truth and teach me,
for you are God my Savior,
    and my hope is in you all day long. Psalms 25:5

Praise be to the Lord,
for he has heard my cry for mercy.
The Lord is my strength and my shield;
my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.
My heart leaps for joy,
and with my song I praise him. Psalms 28:6-7

Many are the plans in a man’s heart, 
but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails. Psalms 19:21
 

 

It is not His fault

God is the god of peace and understanding.

This is a phrase that I have been hearing a lot over the last few weeks.

It is not His fault that I have gotten my hopes up.

I am just having a hard time understanding the purpose of it all.

Did I make the wrong decision?

God, did I hear wrong?

Was I listening to my heart more then your voice?

What is your plan for me Lord, now that I don't have one?

I am so numb to the whole thing right now and I am having a hard time grasping what is going on. What is suppose to happen over the next five months?

I never would have thought that...

I never would have thought that I would have such a love for Southeast Asia.

I never would have thought that I would want to spend my summer there.
I never would have thought that I would be here today

I never would have thought that this would be a possibility for me.

I never would have thought that God would bless me in this way. 
I never would have thought that my life would end up this way
I never would have thought that God would have giving me a desire to help those in need.
I never would have thought that my major would be environmental engineering.
I never would have thought that I would be who I am today.
:-)

A God Ordained Meeting

The coolest thing happened to me yesterday!! I mean the most random but most exciting thing ever! I don't know how else to explain it then... GOD!!

I went to dinner before work with Whitney and her boyfriend Chris. I have not seen Chris since freshman year of college when Whitney and I lived together. So it was really fun to catch up with him and see them together. They have been together going on four years! So we are sitting at Cafe Plaid talking. asking questions about school and what not. Well Chris asks me about my Christmas trip. So I tell him a little about it, but get the idea that because he is an engineer like me he would appreciate hearing about RDI. Resource Development International has been working actively on water, sanitation, education, and community development projects since 2000 in countries all over the world. I heard about them while I was in Cambodia and just got really excited about the opportunities that could arise with working for them some day. A friend that lives in Cambodia full time was telling me that they take volunteer interns all the time and I could come out and work for them in the future. It was one of the most encouraging conversation just for the simple fact that RDI does exactly what I want to do in my future! Well as I am telling Chris about this a lady in the booth behind us turns around and starts telling me that her and her husband were just working with RDI over Christmas break in... get this... Cambodia. I almost peed my pants. I told her that I was just there over break too and we figured out that we were there at the exact same time. Now how stinking cool is that. Noralea told me that her and her husband work with Cru (another Christian ministry) here on the Norman campus She asked me my name and ended up friending me on facebook right then and there. She asked me if I would have time to get coffee sometime in the future and I jumped on that like no ones business haha. As I was leaving to head to work I got to meet her husband, Ryan who had come in earlier. I shared with them that I was environmental engr. and they really liked that lol and I told them that RDI is doing the exact thing that I want to do some day!!

It truly blows my mind at how God is continually working things out in my life. The day before this happened I had sent in my application to go back overseas over the summer and the next day I meet husband and wife who are doing what I want to do someday!! That is not some coincidence. God really is working and pointing me in a direction for life. I am so excited to get coffee with Noralea soon. This meeting was just the thing that I needed. It was a great reminder that God has a plan for me. I might not even know what I am doing this summer but I am trust that whatever it is, it will be exactly what God wants from me! I love the way Jesus works in our lives and just getting to see the connections made through Jesus is awesome. There is no other way to explain the randomness of meeting Noralea then to say it was Jesus that put us at Cafe Plaid in booths right next to each other at the same time. My mind is blown each time I think about it. How God works and how big He is!!!!!!!!!!!!!