Freedom

free·dom

[free-duh m]

noun

1. the state of being exempt from external authority, or at liberty rather than in confinement or under physical restraint

  

In a "free" country what does having freedom look like to me? Do I really understand that I am free... in Christ?

The Lord has brought this concept and this word across my path on several different occasions in the last month.
 

My pastor and I got together on a Thursday in the middle of January, to sift through my future plans. This was the first time I heard it and this is what he said to me:

I have freedom to make a decision.

"I can plan but it only happens because God allows; fight against the myth of control, it is my job to be free."

My decision in May 2013 might not be my decision in November 2013 or February 2014. I am not deciding the rest of my life.

 

Three days later at church Andy spoke about Galatians 5, which the title of first 15 verses is "Freedom in Christ."

He said that freedom is getting to fulfill our desires.

He asked the question at the very end of the service: What would it look like in my life it I were free?

Hearing this immediately brought me back to the conversation we had prior.

 

Two weeks later at Paradigm Church, Nick Cooper was talking about Greatness. He talked about being staying on the path that is marked out for me and the fact that:

 Freedom does not equal Chaos and Order does not equal Bad. If I stay on the path I am free and freedom brings God glory.

I just lost it. I have never felt so defeating in my thinking before. I told myself "I need to stop thinking about my choices needing to be perfect. God has given me freedom in him to stay in Norman, go to Fort Worth, or even trek out to Cali."

 

Last night at ReGroup I approached Andy about this concept again. I said that I was just having a hard time wrapping my mind around picking one and it ending up ok.

Again he told me that I just need to pick. He told me that if one of my options were not wise he would have let me know. He reminded me that the worst thing that can happen is I figure out it wasn't the right thing and I make a change from there.

 

I have had the hardest time wrapping my head around the fact that I can choose. Maybe I am just not trusting myself enough. Trusting who I am in God and how he has shaped me over the last 23 years, to allow me to make this kind of decision and make a good one.

It is not like God has never given me opportunities like this to trust Him before. My sophomore year, I chose between Project Impact in Cali or Denver (which once I decided on Denver I knew it was right). This past summer I had to choose between Cambo or Israel (and I got neither).

 

I can say I think this decision is so much harder for me because it is my future. After going to Devner, I still had school. Same with this past summer, I still had another year of classes left. I was not changing the course of my life in those decisions. But the one thing I keep coming back to is TRUST!

Am I going to trust that I can not mess up what the Lord has for me? He is bigger than any decision I make or am going to make. Am I going to trust that His will is better then anything I could come up with on my own?

 

 

Galatains 5:1 "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery."

 

Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."