Fort Worth

So much has changed for me over the last two months and I want to share that with you all. This is an entry from my journal on June 15th.

I have been in Fort Worth for 34 days and besides still living with my parents and not having an engineering job it is starting to feel normal (in the community sense). I am babysitting for different families, spending time with friends, serving at Hope and involved in a Growth Group . For the time being I live here... I am getting comfortable here and there is a part of me that could see myself staying here (weird thought). Lord, I need your guidance, if the enemy is trying to distact me from what you want for me I pray in the name of Jesus Christ that you wil bind him and remove those unhelpful thoughts. I just ask that you continue to point me in the right direction. Amen.

This was a huge revelation for me. I had made the decision back in February that I was moving to California. I didn't want to live in Fort Worth again. When I left after high school I never thought I would be back. Why was this even a thought? What is God trying to say to me? I wasn't really sure what to do with this new thought that Fort Worth really is an option for me. But for some reason I could not shake it. I made time to talk with two older ladies at Hope that could help me process through as well as one of my best friends. I was given a lot of great things to think through: What was the motivation for going out to Cali, what emotions would I be taking out to Cali, Do I need to stay?? 

I have never thought of moving out to California in a "negative" light... Not that is was a bad thing but just that Fort Worth might have different things to offer me than I thought. I prayed, process and finally realized that I had some things that I needed to work on here in Fort Worth before I went out and I could get some amazing training opportunities while at Hope Church. So with The Lord's leading I made the decision to stay in Fort Worth instead! I could go on and on into the things that that went into the decision but all that I really need to say is that Jesus wants me here and He is going to do different things in my life, hard good things, that I would not have been able to experience.

Now that is has been a few months since this whole ball got rolling, I am so grateful that I am here. I still do not have an engineering job but I have become a member of Hope Church, in charge of planning a kids event, joined a fall growth group, made some great new friends, learned more and more how to walk with God and trust Him in all circumstances. I am so thankful and amazed by the love and grace of Jesus!!